Constellations and Contemplation
by inthelittledoctor
Summary: They're staring up at the stars and he's telling her about the constellations. He's telling her all he knows. Then he's thinking, his mind wandering. He's thinking about her. And she's thinking about him. {Whouffaldi}


He'd told her that they were going somewhere breathtaking. And with all of the places that he'd taken her, she wouldn't be surprised if it actually did take her breath away. So, she'd hopped into the TARDIS and ran away with him, going to go see something breathtaking with someone that took her breath away. He'd ended up taking her to an empty field, where the grass was the colour of lilacs and the clouds were like ice. The sky was jet black, with stars scattered about. As much as she hated to admit it, the sight had taken her breath away.

So now here they are, laying in the grass, looking up at the stars. He's resting his hands on his stomach and she has her hands behind her head. She's looking up at the stars in awe as he talks about the constellations on this planet. He's telling her how each constellation was born and why it was made into a constellation. He's taking one of his hands off of his stomach and pointing up at the stars, showing her which stars connect to make constellations. Then she's looking at him and smiling, moving over to him and kissing the corner of his mouth.

'Shut up,' she's whispering, laying back down and looking up at the sky again.

He's furrowing his brow and looking at her, seeing her smiling. His expression is relaxing and the corner of his lips are twitching upwards. He's putting his hand back onto his stomach and shifting slightly, moving closer to her in the progress. He's glancing at her lips. He wants to kiss her. He wants to tell her how he feels about her. He wants to tell her how his hearts seem to race whenever he thinks about her. He wants to tell her how she makes him feel fluttery and nervous. He wants to tell her that she's all he can think about day and night. Whether he's saving a planet, or just sitting in the TARDIS next to the console resting, he's always thinking about her. She's become an obsession of sorts. He can barely do anything without her because when he does try to do things by himself, all he wants to do is be with her.

She's become his world. His Galaxy. His universe. His life. He's tried to deny that he feels anything towards her. But, it's gotten to the point where he can no longer deny it. He is completely and utterly in love with Clara Oswald. He's in love with everything about her. He's even in love with just the thought of her. She is his everything. But, how would she react if he told her that? Would she just laugh? Would she reject him? Would she want to stop traveling with him?

Then he's sighing, looking back up at all of the stars in the sky. Maybe she would tell him that she loved him back. He laughs quietly, not a hint of humour in his laugh. Clara Oswald, loving him. Now she's looking back at him, raising an eyebrow at him.

'What're you laughing at?' She's asking.

He's telling her it's one of the constellations. He's telling her that he's laughing at its story and how daft it is. She knows he's lying. She always knows when he's lying. Usually she just ignores it, but today is different. Today it seems as though something has changed with him and she wants to know what. So she's sitting up, moving her hand to his mouth and moving closer to him.

'Doctor,' she's whispering,'Tell me the truth.'

Then he's glaring at her, taking one of his hands off of his stomach and taking her hand off of his mouth. She's frowning and placing her hand on the ground. Now he's sighing and telling her that it's nothing, but she's having none of that. She's moving a hand to the other side of him, then she's moving her head up to his so she can look into his eyes. Her chest is gazing his and he's holding his breath. She's breathing out his name, her hands shifting on the ground as she moves her face closer to his. He's whispering her name, his voice gravelly. His words send a shiver down her spine and it's taking everything in her to not just close the distance and kiss him right now. And now his breathing is becoming faster and he's closing his eyes, trying to pretend like she is not on top of him right now.

Now she's looking at him with his eyes closed and she's pretty sure she's going to go mad if she doesn't kiss him. She knows that kissing him would be daft. He probably wouldn't talk to her for months if she kissed him. He might never talk to her again if she kisses him. What's the point of kissing him if it causes him to shut her out? She'd much rather go mad than lose him. She wants to sit up, but her body isn't letting her. He's opening his eyes, but she's still entranced by her lips.

'Clara?' He's saying, rolling the r in her name.

And that's all that she can take. She quickly gets off of him and lays back down next to him.

He's turning his head and looking over at her, placing his hand in between them, the other hand still on his stomach. She looks over at him, her cheeks a rosy pink that he can just barely see in the starlight. She's beautiful in the starlight. If he's being honest with himself, she's beautiful in any light. He tears his gaze away from her and looks up at the stars.

'What would you do if I told you that I loved you?' he's asking, as if it is the simplest question in the world.

Her eyes are widening and she's looking up at the stars. Did he really just ask that? No, she must have heard him wrong. He would never ask her something like that, would he? She's glancing back at him, looking to see if there is a joking expression on his face. His expression is relaxed and to her surprise, he actually looks mildly happy. She opens her mouth to say something, but quickly closes it and looks at his hand in between them. And now she's placing her hand over his, intertwining her fingers with his. He's looking over at her and she's looking over at him.

'Your eyes are doing the thing again,' he's muttering.

'Shut up,' she's whispering.

She's sighing and thinking about how to answer his question. She loves him. She knows that. And know that he's asked that question, she's pretty sure that he loves her in return. So what's stopping her from telling the truth? Maybe it's because she thinks that the question is rhetorical. Maybe he's just trying to let her know how he feels without really saying it. Saying it without saying it.

Now she's closing her eyes and holding his hand tighter. He's looking down at their hands and smiling sadly, stroking her hand with his thumb.

'Doctor?' she's saying, looking back at him.

'Yeah?' he's replying.

'If you told me that you loved me, then I would tell you that I loved you too.'


End file.
